Benicke knows the issue from both sides. In the '80s and early '90s she advocated abortion. After all, she'd had one herself.
"Women come here and tell me that their friends say abortion is no big deal," she says. "And that's what I used to say. 'It was the best decision for me at the time,' I would tell people. My boyfriend threatened to leave me if I didn't have the abortion, and I had just started a wonderful new job. It was 'the wrong time' to have a baby.
The boyfriend and career both disappeared, but she insisted for a long time that she had made the right decision. And she knows why.
"The only alternative to defending abortion," she says, "is to face up to what you've really done. You've paid someone to kill your child."
Benicke pauses. "I know I have God's forgiveness," she says after a moment, "but I still struggle with forgiving myself."
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